


Mercy

by AwesomeGoldfish



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gen, Light Angst, One-Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-07-02
Packaged: 2018-02-07 02:38:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1881948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwesomeGoldfish/pseuds/AwesomeGoldfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mikasa writes down her feelings in a journal.</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p><br/>In conclusion, it’s better if I don’t make these attachments. They lead to fruitless emotions that will just cause problems later. So... I will just let them go. They will fall away with my fear. </p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>    <em>Help me. Please.</em><br/></p>
</blockquote>
            </blockquote>





	Mercy

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a one-shot I wrote when I was bored. Hope you guys like it and if there is anything I can improve on then don't hesitate to share.
> 
> Hopefully more stories will by posted soon, if you have a suggestion or request then I would love to hear it ^_^

_Mercy._

A monochrome world moved around me. I was just seen as another splash of gray on a single-coloured canvas. In this place we live in, this world that I only see as hell. In these uniforms, we are only seen as pawns in this game of war. In which the prices for victory are high.

_Mercy, I beg of you. Mercy._

The fear that has settled over everyone else has not reached me yet. I refuse to let it. This mask, which I have spent years fortifying, will not crumble under such trivial matters as fear. Although, it seems to bring everyone else to their knees. Corporal Levi does not seem to have these emotions either, but he has grown heartless over years of seeing everyone else perish around him.  
... will I become like that?

_Please, make it stop. Make it all stop._

Eren... I’ve almost lost him too many times. I get horribly terrified whenever that happens. That is the only time when fear takes it’s firm grip on my heart. The rest of the time I seem to be numb. That is the only word I can think of that describes it. Numb. I would like to think- no, I **do** think that it’s just to make myself stronger. This is what I’ve tricked myself into thinking so many times before and continue to do so.

_I don’t want to be in this hell anymore._

I’m supposed to be the strongest, and I am. I am the most powerful out of all the 104th Trainee squad. I will stand by Eren as he destroys these monsters from hell, the things we named Titans. I will protect him, the last of my family.  
I refuse to lose them; Eren, Armin, Sasha, Connie and even Jean. I don’t want to lose any of those which have been accepted into this little family of ours. But.. I know I won’t be able to stop it if it’s to happen.  
  
In conclusion, it’s better if I don’t make these attachments. They lead to fruitless emotions that will just cause problems later. So... I will just let them go. They will fall away with my fear.

_Help me. Please._

~     ~     ~

 

“Hey! Mikasa?” a voice pierced through the girl’s thoughts.

  
A pencil ceased to run along the pages of the silky black-haired girl’s journal, bringing the room back to silence. She looked up at the hot-headed brunette, closing the book without haste.

  
“What is it Eren?” words rolled off her tongue in a monotoned symphony.

  
“I was wondering what you were writing about.” he stated bluntly.

  
“It’s nothing much. Just things I was thinking about.” the girl responded in the same tone, sinking slightly into her blood red scarf.

  
“So can I see?”

  
Sad eyes met curious ones and Eren almost instantly wanted to take back his request. He could tell just by looking at her, that he had upset the red scarf wearing girl. She squeezed the book into her chest, dropping their locked gaze.

  
“No.” the simple reply said in the quietest voice, seemed to boom throughout the room and down hallways. Eren didn’t say anything in reply, nor did she continue with conversation. They stayed like that, the girl ‘s eyes downcast and the boy looking at her with such regret. That was until she stood, walking away without a sound. His eyes followed her until the red scarf and silky black hair had disappeared. Eren tried to understand, tried to know how it felt to be so stoic... but his attempts were all in vain. Mikasa and himself were just too different, he wouldn’t be able to understand her and vice-versa.

  
The journal remained held tightly into her chest.

  
They would be thrown away soon. All the people she met and all these emotions she felt for them. They will fall away like rain, and she won’t have to feel them anymore. She won’t have to feel that regret when they leave this world, one way or another.  
  
 _I am falling into this monochrome world, from which there is no escape. No one can save me because I’m too far gone. But please, have mercy on them. I’ve worked so hard to protect them._

_Mercy._

**Author's Note:**

> Please see Notes. At the top of the page ^_^


End file.
